No Victim

I think it is important to make something really clear: I am not a victim in all of this.

While I am not sure my situation was handled well by the church, I am not a victim and I don’t think the church is filled with bad or mean people.  To the contrary, I think the church is filled with wonderful people.

I am a victim of my own sin and brokenness.  

What has happened is because of choices I made. Choices to ignore God’s wisdom and word, choices to stay hidden, choices to violate trust that had been put in me.

And moving forward, I am making different choices.

So I appreciate people who, out of compassion, feel badly for what has happened.  Frankly, it sucks and so I appreciate that you feel badly that I have had to go through this all… but I’m not a victim of the church… just of myself.

That said, my hope for the future is that churches would get better at creating spaces and places where people can deal with the real stuff of life with integrity.  That is my prayer and dream moving forward.